The Forgetful Listener

 

But be sure you live out the message and do not merely listen to it and so deceive yourselves.  James 1:22

 One of the struggles that I’ve experienced post-brain surgery is with my memory, especially short-term. I have also, at times, really struggled to understand conceptual conversations and presentations. I need concrete examples of anything in order to really get what you’re talking about. For example, I can’t even seem to think of an example of that! All I know is that my husband will be talking to me, or I will be listening to a sermon at church, and I have no idea what is going on. And then the pastor will tell a story that illustrates the message and – Bam! I get it. Or my husband will share something with me and I don’t even feel like I have a bucket in my head to put it in, then I’ll say, “For example…” and if he can share with me an instance of what he’s talking about all of a sudden the conversation comes into clarity – like when I put my glasses on.

 A couple of weeks ago, my daughter spoke to me about something I had done that had bothered her. I can remember visually where we were, driving home from my Mom’s house. I can remember the conversation because it was so emotionally triggering for me. You see, I remember that I apologized and said that I was also sorry if I forgot the conversation and did the thing again in the future. Then she shared that we had already had that conversation and I had already, indeed, forgotten it and done it again. I was devastated. I felt so awful that I silently wept all the way home. Here’s one of the most awful parts, I’m not being purposely vague here. I can remember the conversation, and the forgetting part, but I’ve already completely forgotten what it was that I’d done wrong that she had asked me to do differently in the future! I’m sitting here racking my brain and I just can’t grab onto the memory at all. I felt so bad that I’d forgotten and injured her heart again, and now I’ve forgotten it all over! The part that super bugs me is that I actually remember the conversation this time, I just can’t for the life of me remember what it was about.

 Our verse today cautions us about the importance of living out what we learn and not just listening to it. As the passage continues, it talks about not being a “forgetful listener.” When our kids were little, we had a tradition of going out to eat after church, and while we were there, we would discuss the sermon or the children’s teaching. We would ask what everyone’s takeaway was. As I’m remembering back to those days, I can remember that we had those conversations, but I certainly can’t remember what any of the takeaways were! In fact, I remember struggling in the moment to even remember the sermon I had just listened to. So maybe not all of these memory issues are recent! I was always able to come up with something though, some little nugget of learning that stuck with me. This morning I’m trying to remember the sermon I sat and listened to a week ago, and I’ve got nothing. I vaguely remember a reference to Jesus feeding the 5,000, but I can’t for the life of me remember what the point our pastor was trying to make was. I feel so bad about that. I know I was paying attention. I also know I am a very visual learner and so auditory messages don’t get stuck in my mind as well. I think that’s part of why I use so many pictures in my blog posts. When I look back, I see the pictures and remember the lesson.

 How can I do what our verse today commands, live out the message and don’t merely listen to it, when I can’t seem to remember what I hear? When I’m cooking, I have to check the recipe 30x or more. How many teaspoons of that herb do I need? What do I do after that? How long does it go in the oven? What size pieces do I chop the onion into? I check the recipe over and over and over and over again. Even then, a fair percentage of the time, we’ll sit down to dinner and I’ll realize I forgot an ingredient or a step in the process. Most of the time it’s not a big deal, but it still really bothers me because I tried so hard! I think that’s what I need to do with this issue though as well. I need to keep coming back to God’s Word over and over and over and over and over again. I need to ask God’s forgiveness for the times I mess up or forget something I knew I was supposed to do and give myself grace as well. Then I need to just keep going back to His Word again!

Here's the Thing: I don’t want to be a forgetful listener. I don’t want to look in the mirror and then walk away and forget how I look. I don’t want to listen to a sermon and then an hour later have no idea what was said. And yet I do. I cannot change that. I’ve tried all the tricks. I’ve taken notes, drawn images that represent things, quizzed myself and others, nothing seems to change that. Is there any hope for me?

Abiding in Jesus

  1. Week 1: Trusting the Gardener's Work
    1. John 15:1 - Seven Things Jesus Is
    2. John 15:2 - Pinch Those Suckers Out!
    3. Philippians 2:12-13 - Working Out My Salvation
    4. Matthew 5:16 - Stay Salty!
    5. 1 John 1:6 - Walking in Relationship
  2. Week 2: Bearing Lasting Fruit
    1. John 15:3-4 - It Takes Two to Abide
    2. John 15:5 - Grafted In
    3. John 15:6 - The Most Important Post You'll Ever Read
    4. Psalm 1:1-3 - What We Expect to See
    5. Galatians 5:22 - The Fruit of the Spirit's Not a Coconut!
  3. Week 3: Abiding in Jesus Through His Word
    1. John 15:7-8 - Lost in the Wilderness
    2. John 8:31-32 - The Truth Shall Set You Free
    3. Psalm 119:9-11 - Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth
    4. Psalm 119:15-16 - Considering His Ways
    5. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 - How is He Going to Use THAT?!?
  4. Week 4: Abiding in Jesus Through Obedience
    1. John 15:9-10 - Love, Honor and Obey
    2. James 1:22 - The Forgetful Listener
    3. 1 John 3:24 - How Can I Know if I Have the Holy Spirit in Me?
    4. Matthew 7:24-25 - What's Your House Made Of?
    5. John 14:23-24 - Obeying with All My Heart
  5. Week 5: Abiding in Jesus Through Love
    1. John 15:11-12 - Waking Up on the Right Side of the Bed
    2. John 15:13-14 - Laying Down Your Life
    3. 1 John 4:10 - In This is Love
    4. 1 John 4:11-12 - Loving our Enemies
    5. Romans 12:9-13 - Roadmap to Abiding in Christ
  6. Week 6: Chosen and Commissioned by Christ to Bear Fruit
    1. John 15:15 - A Friend that Sticks Closer than a Brother
    2. John 15:16 - Bloom Where You’re Planted
    3. Ephesians 2:10 - Do the Thing in Front of You
    4. Galatians 6:9 - We Must Not Grow Weary in Doing Good
    5. John 15:17 - What Does Abiding in Christ Look Like?

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