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Knowing Your Limits

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  Did you know that there is a maximum dose of radiation that has been determined for each human body organ? This is a lifetime limit called the organ tolerance dose   because radiation damages the tiny blood vessels inside organs, causing them to progressively narrow and scar — a process called obliterative endarteritis. Over time, normal tissue is replaced by stiff, fibrous scar tissue that has little capacity to function or heal. These changes are largely irreversible (1). So, with few exceptions, radiation therapy is a once-and-done treatment. The image above is of my treatment plan with the different colors representing different levels of radiation being delivered. The red in the center is the highest dose and the blue at the outside the lowest. This means that my scalp received the least amount of radiation, and therefore the lowest side-effects, like skin redness and hair loss. That doesn't mean I didn't experience it at all, but it was limited as much as possible: ...
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Where He Leads I Will Follow: Adam and Agency

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  And the Lord God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.”   Genesis 2:16-17  These verses describe the institution of human agency. God could have made us as automatons that would blindly obey Him, but He didn’t. He gave us choice. He gave us independent minds that could understand our options and weigh our decisions. Later this week, we’ll look at what humanity did with that gift (spoiler alert, it wasn’t good), but for today I want to focus on the gift itself.  Why did God make us with the ability to choose for ourselves? Well, I’m not God, so I can’t speak for Him, but I have a pretty good guess. I wrote a long time ago about how forced love isn’t love at all. If you were to use a love potion, as happens in movies, on the person you desired and they instantly became infatuated with you, you’d know they didn’t re...
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Where He Leads I Will Follow: Intro

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   God's timing is... eerily perfect. I got home from my radiation therapy setup appointment, and this study was in my mailbox. At no point in my past did I think that God would lead me into a season of brain radiation, but here I am. So, here comes the test of if I will truly follow God into whatever season He leads me into...  Obedience to God is not something we do to earn our salvation or atone for our sins. It is not a burden placed upon us, but rather the product of a grateful heart overflowing with joy and love of its Savior. The commands of God are not harsh or heavy. They were given for our benefit and blessing. In this next study, Where He Leads I Will Follow , we will look at key figures in the Bible, their decisions about whether or not to obey in pivotal moments in their lives, and the outcomes of those decisions. Looking at the list in the Table of Contents, if I didn't already know the stories of these brothers and sisters of mine in the past, this would al...
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Making It Work: Chicken Day

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Sometimes life isn't ideal. Let's face it, most of the time it isn't! So, we do what we need to, to make things work. In my "Making It Work" posts, I share life hacks and ideas that have helped me so that, maybe, they can help someone else too. I hope you enjoy!  Who doesn't like to get something for nothing? Especially when it comes to high quality ingredients that we use all the time in the kitchen!?! Today, we're talking about broth, chicken broth. For years now - over a decade really, I've made it a point to make my own. If you buy it at the store it's ridiculous! For one thing, you have no control over the ingredients they are putting into it at all. For another, the "better" the brand the higher the price! Today, at Fred Meyers, for a quart - just 4 cups - of Kettle & Fire chicken bone broth you'll pay $15. FIFTEEN DOLLARS!!! What if I told you that you could get broth just as tasty, with ingredients as good or better, for n...
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Trusting God in the Midst of Suffering: Wrap Up

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   Sometimes life is hard. Things just don’t add up. You hurt. You’re worn out. You’ve waited and waited, and reprieve doesn’t seem to be on the horizon. The Bible doesn’t shy away from these difficult seasons in our lives. It doesn’t shame us, or tell us we’re wrong to feel sad, scared or lost. Instead, it comes alongside us and says, yes, your brothers and sisters have felt that way too. You are not alone. The Bible teachs us about Lament.  What is lament and how are we, as Christians, to use it in our spiritual life? Lament isn’t something that is often talked about in church or by the Christian influencers online that we follow. According to  Bible Hub , lament is, “a form of prayer and expression that encompasses sorrow, mourning, and a plea for divine intervention.” It is a spiritual discipline, much like prayer and Bible reading. But lament is not just an expression of grief, it is also an articulation of trust in God amidst suffering and injustice. Lament...
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Trusting God in the Midst of Suffering: A Psalm of Praise

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  Every day I will praise you! I will praise your name continually! The LORD is great and certainly worthy of praise! No one can fathom his greatness!   Psalm 145:2-3  This psalm begins, "David's Psalm of Praise," indicating that it was personal and special to him. Today, I'm writing my own psalm of praise after its pattern.  A Salty Zebra’s Psalm of Praise My heart considers You, my Wonderful Creator. You are good and all-knowing, Your power knows no end. My ancestors praised You, following You all their lives. I’ve endeavored to teach my children Your ways, Your praise will echo throughout eternity as Your children honor You! In the morning, I consider Your Word. You open my eyes to see amazing things You have done, My heart quickens at the epiphanies You provide. You are powerful to save, nothing is beyond You. You created it all, And all of creation is Yours. To whom shall I compare You, for You are above and beyond all. Your goodness never...
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Preparing for Radiation: Wrap Up

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  Over the next few weeks, I'll be sharing regular posts about how I'm preparing for radiation. I'm hoping these can help someone else, as I struggled to find a conversational source like this that dealt with the subject. For more information on my brain tumor, check out these posts .  I've spent the last three months' worth of Mondays sharing with you all about how I came to do radiation therapy for my brain tumor and how I've been preparing for it. My hope is that these posts can serve as insight, advice, or even just commiseration for others that are facing brain radiation, as I struggled to find a resource out there like this one. If you have found value in these posts, I would greatly appreciate it if you'd let me know in the comments and/or share this series with anyone in your sphere that might be able to benefit from them. The Monday that this post is published marks the final week of my treatment. As I mentioned in this post , the literature suggest...
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