Salty Zebra

   As a young wife and mom, I struggled. I was also young in my faith, having only started walking with Jesus a few months after my first son was born. Everything was hard. I had four kids under 6, one of them newly brought into our home from a war-torn country with all the trauma that goes along with it. The other 3 were no cake walk either with serious food allergies that had to be catered to, making it so that I had to make nearly everything we ate from scratch. I was also in the early years of my marriage, and we were simultaneously learning how to be good Christians and good spouses, and had mastered neither. I heard the story of Esther, and I wondered, could God have brought me here for such a times as this?   Fast forward several years and I’m two years into braces, not a fun journey, and facing complete reconstructive jaw surgery. Months of recovery while trying to balance caring for and homeschooling four kids. My husband was travelling regularly, being gone...

  “For the Lord promotes justice, and never abandons his faithful followers. They are permanently secure, but the children of the wicked are wiped out.”   Psalm 37:28  Have you ever made cookies? It’s a process. First you put in the softened butter and you turn on the mixer to beat it, a lot. You beat it and beat it until it is “creamed”. If you were the butter, you wouldn’t think very well of this! But then you add in the sugar. That’s sweet! But wait! Then comes the beating again! When you finish this part though, the butter and sugar have come together in a wonderful cohesiveness. It was brutal, but the results are smooth and sparkly and sweet, but not quite cookies yet! Next, someone comes along and lays an egg on it. Eww. Have you ever just had a load of icky, gooey gunk dropped in your life? You know, like a lay off, or a chronic illness, or a broken relationship. Just yuck. Or at least it seems that way, but it has a purpose! Yet again, the mixture is beat...

 I have an Adult Pilocytic Astrocytoma. That's a WHO Grade 1 benign brain tumor. So really, it should be no big deal, right? That's what I thought when they told me, and for nearly a year afterwards. Benign sounds, well, benign right? From Webster's 1828 Dictionary (the only real dictionary 😉): Benign BENI'GN, adjective beni'ne. [Latin benignus, from the same root, as bonus, bene, ancient Latin benus, Eng. boon.] 1. Kind; of a kind disposition; gracious; favorable.      Our Creator, bounteous and benign 2. Generous; liberal; as a benign benefactor. 3. Favorable; having a salutary influence; as the benign aspect of the seasons.      The benign light of revelation. 4. Wholesome; not pernicious; as a benign medicine. 5. Favorable; not malignant; as a benign disease.  Doctors seem to want to make you feel like you're doing good, you've got a win, everything's fine. They tell you, "Good news! Its a WHO Grade 1 benign tumor." You walk away thinking...

 This is my first (I think) by-request post for the Salty Zebra blog I've done! My daughter-in-law told me during our recent family vacation that I ought to do an "Everywhere I've Been" bullet style post. Honestly, it feels a little overwhelming, but I'm going to dig in and see if I can do it! To start with, I'm not covering everywhere I've been in my home state of Washington. There are a few places here I haven't been yet, but not many, and that could get tedious! Next, I figured I'd break it down into domestic, then by region/state, and international travel. I hope you enjoy! I'd love to hear about your travels and favorite places to visit. What's on your bucket list? Domestic Travel West Oregon I've driven through Oregon a few times, but as far as staying, there's a few places I'd note: Newport / Siletz Seaside Tillamook Portland California Again, I've driven through here a few times, but here are the places I've spen...

  “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”   Philippians 4:6  After yesterday’s study, you’d think that this verse would immediately draw my heart to anxiety over my husband’s job search and the future of my health insurance, but I’m focused on something much more immediate today, pain. Over the last several days my pain levels have been steadily increasing, and my standard pain management meds and techniques have been steadily less effective.   This morning, I am at a solid 6, maybe even a 7. What does that mean? Good question. I hate pain scales. I hate when a doctor asks, “On a scale of 1-10, what is your pain at?” I have SO MANY MEMES for that! You see, everyone experiences pain differently. I’ve heard so many people say, “My pain is at a 10” or even “11.” I could never and have never said that, because on my pain scale if I’m at a 10, I’m unconscious. 10 is where...

  “I will bless those who bless you, but the one who treats you lightly I must curse, so that all the families of the earth may receive blessing through you.”   Genesis 12:3  This morning we found out that after more than 25 years with his company, my husband was laid off. We had several conversations this morning, prayed together multiple times (I am so blessed to have a husband that loves the Lord!), and still we both are in more than a little shock. My husband left to have a meeting about a prospective job opportunity, and I sat down to finally do my Bible study. I never have to wonder if God has a plan, or if He has put things together with intentional timing, because I have seen it first hand so often, and today was one of those times. Here’s an excerpt from the devotional for today that sounded like it was written directly to me: “Just like Abram, we often find ourselves walking through seasons of uncertainty, not knowing what the future holds. But the sa...

Yet another post told in memes, not because it's funny, but because if I don't laugh, I'll cry... On a recent trip to Texas, I experienced several of the more "tropish" interactions of being an ambulatory wheelchair user and I thought I'd take the opportunity to share so that you can avoid making someone feel like I did. Ableism, it's a thing. It's real. People don't realize they have it. Educate yourself! "You're walking! It's a miracle!"   So, I'm sitting on the shuttle to the airport and my husband loads my wheelchair on. The driver looks around with a confused expression and asks, "Whose wheelchair is that?" I awkwardly raise my hand and he throws his hands up in the air and says, "It's a miracle!" I think he thought he was being funny. He wasn't. The reality is, if I couldn't get out of my wheelchair we couldn't use their service because IT IS NOT ACCESSIBLE. Shame on them, not on me fo...