Day 14: If at first you don't succeed...

 


    I was tempted to do a "make-up" post for the one I missed yesterday, but I'm just going to own the mistake and keep plugging along.  I think that's an important skill to have when you are dealing with chronic illness.  You are going to hit speed bumps, or like when I was learning to drive, you may even jump fully over the curb, but the key is to not get stuck there.  Giving up is easier than pushing through, but it's not nearly as rewarding.  

    Every day lately I wake up with less energy than I think I need to do the basic tasks of my day, things like showering, fixing and eating food, and picking up after myself.  On top of that, I have this ever-growing "To-Do" list. No, for real, it's an actual list in an app called "To-Do."  It feels like for everything I check off, I add three more.  I go to bed every night exhausted and feeling like I didn't get enough done.  What is one to do in the face of this?  All I know to do is just keep putting one foot in front of the other.  I keep trying to do the next best thing, and the next, and the next, and recognize when I need to take a break or call it a day.  

    Depression is a very real challenge for people with chronic illness.  I think it's the "chronic" part of that that gets us down.  It's unrelenting, never ending.  I have very little hope that it will be better tomorrow, and it's likely to be worse next year.  The key is to focus on the present.  Enjoy what I GET to do, appreciate what I have.  

    Music is my heart language, and if that's true for you too, you might enjoy this song.  It's a great, honest perspective on difficult situations with a hint of hope:  https://youtu.be/AKTwwGh8gMo

Here's the thing: I don't know how I'm going to get through today.  I don't know what will go right and what will go wrong.  What I do know is that Jesus is with me through it all and He will give me what I need to do what needs doing.  

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