Day 10: Embracing Provision
I've struggled lately with fear. I fear that I cannot handle today: the pain, the tasks at hand, the emotional cost. I fear what the future will hold. I create in my mind a projection of what that future might look like based on a downward trend that I perceive my body is on. The truth is, God has not given me a vision of the future or knowledge of what is to come. Everything I am worrying about is pure speculation. I have taken away the phrase, "What if?" reasoning that the assumptions I am making about my trajectory are reasoned and have historical basis. The truth is, my fears are still "What if?"s, I've just reframed them into something that seems more responsible.
So what's the answer to fear? Peace. In John 14:27 (NIV) Jesus tells us, "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." In the NET it reads, "Do not let your hearts be distressed or lacking in courage." This tells me that we are in control of our hearts and we can let them be troubled, distressed, afraid, and lacking in courage - or not. We have the choice between fear and peace, but that peace doesn't come from us. It comes from Jesus. We don't have it within ourselves to overcome fear, but Jesus has already given us what we need, we have only to embrace it.
What does this look like? When fear bubbles up inside of me considering how I will handle what's ahead, I can counter it with the truth that Jesus has already planned my days, and His plan is perfect. When I worry that I can't do things, I can remember that I don't have to do them alone - God is with me and He can do anything! When I feel hopeless considering my physical condition, I can find joy in knowing that it is not forever, and if it is now then there is a good reason.
Here's the thing: The only cure for fear is peace, and that peace is available to us all in Jesus. I can't do this on my own, and I don't have to. God's peace is available to me at all times, I just need to embrace it.
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